Abi Titmuss
17/03/2009
Busty blonde actress and presenter enlightens her younger self
If I knew then...
What would you say to your 16-year-old self if you could go back in time? We ask another well known celebrity to offer their younger self some words of wisdom.I went off the rails a bit when I was 16, having been a straight A student until then. It was probably a cry for help - my parents had just divorced. I don’t blame them but it was a difficult time. I used to get sent home from school for having my skirt too short. I got into rock music so I was always wearing tight jeans and little tops, and I started going to nightclubs. I ended up being expelled from school.
I was always popular with boys. I went to an all girls’ school and there was an all boys school round the corner and we used to swap valentines cards. I used to get loads ever year. I was not the prettiest girl in the class by any stretch but I remember them being tipped out over my desk and one of my friends said, “What is it about Abi Titmuss?” I wasn’t interested in schoolboys anyway, I wanted older men. I rushed out of my childhood too quickly.
Regarding men, I’d tell my young self not to waste time playing silly games. Always be honest. Don’t do that thing of pretending not to feel when you do or to feel something when you really don’t. Or not answering the phone so they think you’re out having fun. And avoid any man who tries to control you or makes you feel bad about yourself.
I’ve been de-humanised by the press many times and my family have been badly hurt. The New of the World ‘Abi sex video’ cover was truly horrible. But I’d tell my young self now that everything happens for a reason, and no matter what pain you’re going through will pass. I do meditation now. I wouldn’t want to have had a perfect life – it’s only through pain that you learn and become more alert.
I’d love to tell myself at 16 that one day I’d win an award for being in a play. I won Best West End Debut for the Arthur Miller play I did, Two Way Mirror . That was a moment of complete happiness for me. Acting is what I love, what I’ve always loved since I was 19. I try not to get my self-esteem from the opinion of others – I’d teach my 16 year old self not to - but it did mean a lot to me after having had so much disapproval from people.
Interview: Jane Graham
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